It's that time of year again...

It’s fast approaching that time of year again. The nights are closing in on us, there’s a sharp chill in the air and the leaves are starting to fall down from the trees. You know what that means don’t you? No, not Christmas. It’s time for NaNoWriMo. 

This is my third NaNoWriMo event that I will have taken part in. I first took part last year, and then a second time during the summer’s Camp NaNoWriMo. Somehow, I managed to get past the word count of 50,000 for both of them. That didn’t mean it was easy, and it doesn’t necessarily mean that I’ll be able to do it again this time around.

However, I have learnt a lot from my two previous attempts at novel writing in a month:

I need to watch my words: During the event in July, I had an awful case of word mix up disease. Every time I wanted to write THROUGH or THOUGHT, I would end up typing THOUGH. I’m talking every single time I made this same damn mistake. So needless to say, this time around, I’ll be taking extra care with my typing.

I shouldn't write romance: This is another thing I learnt in July, me and romance do not work. In fiction and in life for that matter. Last November, I wrote a fantasy story that had a romantic element within it. In July, however, the whole story was based on the romance and IT WAS AWFUL. I am not cut out for keeping a full 50,000 word romance story exciting. I’m really not.

Continuity is KEY: Last November, I was constantly forgetting small things that were in the earlier parts of my story. So if I had to come back to anything later on, I was forgetting what I’d written. Planning is crucial for stuff like this. You need to remember tiny little details for everything, just in case you need them later on in the story.

And finally…AVOID DISTRACTIONS: In July, I created a Polyvore account to create style sets for all of my characters, so I had something visual to refer to. This turned out to be a huge mistake because instead of ‘getting inspiration’, I was spending hours looking at pretty fashion designs. Not good.

So, if you’re attempting NaNoWriMo this year, whether it’s you first time on your tenth, then good luck to you. Remember to stay sane and don’t freak out if you don’t hit the word count, because YOU TRIED, and that’s more than many would do. 

It's not me... It's YOU.

It probably comes as no surprise that I am hardly the type of girl who has a huge line of guys outside my front door just waiting to take me out on a date. Even if there were, I probably wouldn’t even notice them due to me not being able to turn my eyes away from the latest TV show I’m hooked on.

But still.

Anyway, last summer there was a guy, like a real life guy who was actually interested me. Shocking, I know. The problem was that this guy had NOTHING in common with me. In fact, he was pretty much everything I didn’t like in a person. He made comments that he thought were hilarious, but were actually quite offensive.

One time when we were talking, I told him I was dying my hair. I’m not lying when I tell you that he actually said this to me:

“Why are you dying it? There is nothing wrong with your natural colour. Why do girls constantly change the way they look to impress guys?”

Of course, I wasn’t having any of that. Did it ever occur to him that a girl might put make up on, change her hair and buy a new dress BECAUSE SHE ACTUALLY WANTS TO DO IT FOR HERSELF? I had to spend half an hour of my precious time on this earth telling him that I dye my hair because I bloody well like it, not because I’m trying to capture a guy’s attention.

After a few more conversations like this, I figured that I was not really going to be able to be friends with this guy. But then he went and asked me on a date. And because I’m not exactly flooded with offers, I actually felt obliged to say yes, simply because there was, for once, someone interested in me.

After a completely miserable time on this date, I realised how stupid I’d been. Just because he was the only member of the male species to want to take me on a date, that didn't mean I actually had to go along with it. This guy was rude, arrogant and generally just not the type of person I’d be friends with. I was never myself around him, I couldn’t joke around with him, yet I wasted time on him simply because he paid attention to me.

So important lesson there: don’t date a guy simply because everyone else has one and you feel like you need one too. You’ll end up miserable. A boyfriend shouldn't be something you feel you have to have with you, like a handbag. It should be someone that you actually enjoy spending time with.

I hope you enjoyed that little bit of relationship advice from someone who knows nothing about relationships. 

Time for Camp

This year, I decided that I would do Camp NaNoWriMo.

For those of you who don’t know, Camp NaNoWriMo is an extension from the main NaNoWriMo which takes place in November, the goal to write a 50,000 word novel in a month. The Camp exists to give a chance to the people who are too busy to participate in November.

Now, I did my first NaNoWriMo last November. If you’ve stuck around long enough, you’ll know that last November I was a stressed wreck. Final deadlines for my final university year all over the place, not to mention exams, yet I still decided to jump into the crazy world of novel writing.

So I don’t exactly have a novel writing talent, before then I’d only made little attempts to write up a story idea. But somehow, I made it through the month and wrote my first ever manuscript. The grammar was atrocious, and the story certainly wasn’t award winning, but I did it.

For some reason, I assumed that after completing my first NaNoWriMo, especially amongst all that stress, that doing Camp NaNoWriMo would be easier.

Ha.

Haha.

Hahahahaha.

How wrong I was.

The novel I wrote in November was fantasy. Every idea I’ve thought up for a potential story has always been fantasy, or supernatural. So in June, I decided that I’d give myself a challenge and try to write a young adult contemporary novel.

I spent June planning (which I didn’t even do in November), creating character profiles and researching. Did any of it help? No. Because for these two weeks of July, I’ve wanted nothing more than to just delete the whole thing.

What have I learned so far during Camp NaNoWriMo?

I suck at writing romance.

Like, really. Maybe it’s because Romance and I are mortal enemies, perhaps? Maybe I’d be better off writing children’s stories, that way they can just have cute and fluffy FRIENDSHIPS.

Me, getting 'inspiration'

I’m spending way too much time going to the beach and calling it ‘inspiration’.

My story is set in a town close to docks and a beach, and both feature quite prominently in the story. For that reason, I’ve spent the past week going to various beaches to take pictures, hoping that they would inspire me. When actually, all I did was lie on the beach for hours and get some attractive sun burn.

Over the past three weeks, I have visited four different beaches, photographed two abandoned boats, and watched one sunset. At least I got some pretty pictures out of it. 

I’ve also learned of my apparent inability to distinguish between the words ‘through’ and ‘thought’. 

Although both very different words, there is only a slight difference between the spelling of them. I have discovered that when my fingers are going crazy fast across that keyboard, mid chapter, the word ‘thought’ often becomes ‘through’. This isn’t just an occasional blimp I make now and again, I do it every single time.

What I keep reminding myself though, is that it is still a learning curve. Okay, so I’m not very good at writing romance novels. At least I’ve tried and found out the hard way. But I’ll keep going with the story, no matter what repetitive drivel it turns out to be, because I never back out of a challenge. 

The things that become interesting...

...when you have more important things to do.

I used to love writing stories when I was younger. Not that they were any good, but I used to love writing them. As I got into my late teens, I found a notebook from when I was 14 and it had all these story ideas I’d written down back then. I read over them. Some of them were really good. One of them was so good that I suddenly found myself wanting to work on it again and write it up. This was when I discovered my dilemma:

I was good at story ideas… But I was awful at writing them.

I’d found this passion for writing, without being able to write at a good standard. I wanted to be an author, but how can you have a bestseller when you can’t even use a comma correctly??

Anyway, I still tried. And failed. But I kept going with the writing. I liked my ideas too much to just let them go, so I carried on and tried to improve my writing skills.

Eventually, I became ok-ish at the writing side of things. Then this November, in the middle of my most stressful time at university, I decided that I was going to take part in NaNoWriMo. For those of you who don’t know, NaNoWriMo is short for National Novel Writing Month and to take part, you have to write a 50,000 word novel, in 30 days.

I had never stuck with a story long enough to get past 5000, let alone 50,000.

I have no idea why I thought it would be a good idea but I did it anyway and for some miraculous reason, I finished writing my first ever novel within the 30 days. With support from others taking part and the daily word goal to get it done, I got it finished!

Great! I thought. I can do it now! I thought

I thought that because I’d been able to finish my first, I’d be able to write up another one of my ideas.

WRONG.

Without the discipline of the 30 day deadline, I failed in motivating myself to actually write. I discovered how easily distracted I am and procrastination is now my middle name. What was I doing to avoid actually writing? Everything.

I signed up to Polyvore. 

I began making style sets for my characters, thinking it would help, when actually all it did was make me addicted to Polyvore and resulted in online shopping of the fashions I was finding there.

I signed up to Wattpad. 

I thought it would be a good idea to put my first story on there, get some feedback and learn about writing. Instead, I ended up playing word games with other users in the forum and read other users’ amazing stories, making my own seem dull and lifeless in comparison.

I signed up to Pinterest. 

I wanted to use it to create inspiration and resourceful clipboards. I planned to add pictures of locations and events that I was going to make happen in my story. However, all I ended up doing was finding a bunch of overly filtered pictures of dip-dyed hair and suddenly wanted to dye my hair pretty colours.

So, to conclude, I have no motivation and discipline issues when it comes to writing. The past month has taught me that writing one novel doesn’t mean I’ll easily be able to write another one, it’s just resulted in me having way more online profiles on websites I’m now addicted to that actually aren’t helping me in any way what-so-ever.

Procrastination for the win! 

*crawls backs into bed with too much chocolate and pins four more pictures of hairstyles on Pinterest.*

All Good Things...

... Must Come to and End

 So, after three long years, I have completed my last day as a university student… And I’m not exactly screeching joyful cheers from the rooftops.

I always assumed I’d be happy to finally leave the chaos of education. I have never had a break from it. I went straight from school into college, then onto university. I was excited to finally have my freedom. But that’s not what I felt when I walked out of the doors after my final exam. Instead, what I felt was panic.

Tidal waves of panic.

WHAT DO I DO NOW?

My life has been a constant stream of education and I have never left the security of it. Now, all of a sudden, I’m out in that ‘big wide world’ everyone talks about and I have no clue what comes next.  

Three years ago, I stepped out onto the grounds of my new university campus without giving a single thought to the end of that degree. I knew that I wanted a media degree, but I wasn’t sure what I wanted to do with it at the end. I loved film, television production, journalism and photography. I just assumed that three years of doings bits of all of them would suddenly make everything fall into place. Like I would wake up one morning and it would suddenly click.

Except it didn’t. I didn’t just suddenly realise what I wanted to do with my life. And now, after three years of film making and stressful assignments, I’m back where I was at the start. 

Stuck.

I don’t know why I expected university to solve everything for me. I went into it expecting more than what I got. I mean, sure, I learnt a lot about the subjects I was studying, but somehow I just thought I’d learn more about life as well.

You hear all those stories about going to university will create all these opportunities and you’ll ‘find’ yourself. Truth is that it wasn’t as life changing for me as people say it should be. I suppose, in a way, it helped me feel more at peace with myself. Before university I didn't have a ‘place’. I didn't it it. I used to change myself to blend in more with the crowds. But at university, I found friends who I had so much in common with that I didn’t have to change the person I was. So, I guess that’s one positive I can take away.

But what else?

What happens now?

Just hang around until my graduation and hope that I have some big epiphany? Guess I’ll just have to wait and see what fist life throws at me next. 

The Love Story...

...Between me and my umbrella.

Me and umbrellas have an unfair relationship in which they walk all over me and I have no control over the matter.

This ugly relationship started when I began university. I made the decision to commute from home (due to the fact that I'm unable to cook, so moving out would mean starvation) but commuting meant a 30 minute walk from my train station.

In the spring, this walk is awesome and has some really pretty scenery going on. In the winter, this walk is Hell. I don't even get snow in the winter to make the cold look pretty, I just get freezing rain and hailstorms. It's awesome.

To make things even better, I suffer from poor circulation. Yes, at the ripe old age of 20 I'm already suffering from poor circulation. The worst part is my hands. They react badly to the cold. And when I say badly, I mean badly.

My hands decided a few years ago that they would swell up in cold weather. Clearly, my hands love me. Anyway, this 'condition' has become nothing but a joke to my best friend, who constantly refers to me as sausage fingers or Shrek fingers in the winter. Yeah, me and my best friend often insult each other for fun.

So, back to the umbrellas. With that half hour walk ahead of me, I must be prepared for every possible weather situation. This means that I always have an umbrella in my bag.

The minute it starts raining, the umbrella goes up. This is when the horrors begin.

I walk along a main road for a part of my journey. This road never fails to be extra windy. So, basically, my umbrella doesn't stand a chance. Within minutes, my umbrella fails to stay strong and gives in to the wind. Cue dramatic brolly blowing inside out and causing me to look like an idiot. Cue beeps from the cars going past with the passengers inside having a good old laugh at my misfortune.

I've lost count of how many umbrellas have turned against me in the last two years of me being at university. I'm used to it happening by now but today I got an extra special treat.

My latest umbrella broke. Before it had even been opened. As I stepped out of uni and saw the rain, I grabbed my umbrella, went to open it and OH I was left just holding the handle. The whole top part of the useless article had completely broken off. I didn't have a hood on my coat so it was clear that I was going to look like a gorgeous sewer rat by the time I got to the train station.

So 20 minutes into my walk, a lorry starts driving up the road. There is a giant puddle on the road. I didn't realise what Mr Lorry Driver had in mind until it was too late. He went straight through that puddle at full speed and I was left looking like I'd just been for a swim in my clothes.

It's clearly been an awesome day for me.

Did I mention how much I hate umbrellas?

Do You Know What Really Annoys Me?

Gossipping Old Women.

You know the ones. I mean the ones that stand there, gossipping about everyone in your neighbourhood.

Now, I'm not saying that I despise old women (I mean, come on, I'm not completely heartless.) but I do despise how they block your way by standing in groups, gossipping, when actually they're in a shopping centre, not a tea shop.

Many times I've been trying to get shopping done and I end up stuck in a tiny little market isle behind some old dears with trolleys, having a natter. Ladies - I'm trying to move here!

Today just tipped me over the edge. I have NOT had a good week as it is. I have caught a cold. Yay. I have an ear infection, due to said cold. Yay. All I wanted from the damn shop was hairspray. That is all. So, I picked up my hairspray and made my way to the tills. Only to find the isle blocked by a group of about 7 little old ladies WHO WOULDN'T SHUT UP. I said 'Excuse me' several time. Very politely, may I add.

Since they weren't making a move, I decided to try and walk around them. I'd love to tell you that I got safely past the gossipping grannies and made my way to the tills, but in my life, things aren't that simple. As I tried to get past the nattering Nana's, my bag knocked a bottle of wine off the shelf.

So, there I was, looking as gorgeous as ever with my red nose, red eyes and the general 'I have a nasty cold' look and the whole shop was staring at me as though I'd just killed someone. Then, one of the grannies looked up at me disapprovingly and said "That was your fault!"

Now, I understand that it was my bag that knocked the bottle. HOWEVER, I wouldn't have had to squeeze my way down the isle if the OAPs were doing what they were supposed to be doing: Shopping instead of chatting!

So, that's exactly what I told the old dears. Of course, it didn't go down too well with them and they walked of snootily with their shopping trolleys muttering about the 'youth of today'.

Moral of the story: Avoid groups of gossipping old women whenever possible. If they can't be avoided, don't try to squeeze past them.

Rant for today over.